I feel like I am on the verge of a major breakthrough...last night I was at Panera trying to study for the CPA exam and right around 6:00pm I realized that I didn't really have the energy to search through all of the random numbers that had gone through my head from the entire day to recite the correct answers to the questions on the CPA study material. I work as an accountant and it is the beginning of my 4th tax season. The nature of this business is staring at tons of numbers throughout the day. Also, it is important to learn a lot of short little tax trivia facts in order to convey the information in an orderly manner to the clients whom it affects. Yesterday, wasn't anything special at work. Little did I know something was brewing...
Jen (my tutor/girlfriend/best friend/most special person to me) and I were going through the first set of cards. After about the 3rd card, I decided that I was ready to quit because I hadn't gotten the answers right on the previous couple of cards. It made me feel like I had hit a mental roadblock and I had no power to bust through...So I began to talk to Jen about unrelated issues and the stress that I have found with holding an accounting position but not truly having a passion for it. Jen in her divine wisdom was able to relay to me that my problem has nothing to do with not having a passion for accounting. She was able to see from an outsider's perspective that I was having a hard time finishing the task that I had set out for. All along, the CPA exam has been hanging over my head. Throughout my career I have told people that I don't truly have a passion for it. It's not the passion that I am lacking. The problem lies in the fact that there is a huge mountain in my face and all I can see is the bottom of the mountain on the other side. That I am not ready to take the steps necessary to get there. I am in too much of a hurry for myself. I want the results without wanting to put the work in. It is uncomfortable for me not to know the answers to the smallest questions. It is going to require work that I didn't before want to put into it.
I listened to a sermon that fell into my lap this morning. It was called Finish It, by TD Jakes. It's funny how God will just absolutely drop the perfect word into our laps when we need it. There are 3 phases of finishing which I would like to share.
1. Finish in Phases - Dont try to finish the entire project or race all at once. Take smalsteps and celebrate small successes.
2. Finish your course - Don't finish someone else's course
- Don't be the next, somebody
-Paul told Timothy (2Tim) That he fought the fight & finished his course
-Things get more difficult as you get towards the end - Kinda funny how Most car wrecks occur less than 1 mile from the person being home.
3. You will see more than you can finish - This means that you might see more of God's plan than the segment that He has called you to perform or execute. A 4x50M relay is a 200M relay. Each of the four athletes are capable of running the entire 200 meters by themselves. But it is a relay, therefore, each of them has a 50 meter leg to run. These athletes can see the entire picture and plan but can only participate in their set 50meters. God might show us more than just the leg that He wants us to run. It is our job to run our portion to the best of our ability until COMPLETION.